Gossip Geek Exclusive! Project Marky Mark Loose on Cambridge

All of us have, at some time or another, imagined how awesome it would be to be one of Ocean's 11 or pull off the Italian Job (or, to a lesser extent, raid the Fogg). These benignly kleptomaniacal tendencies are a result of the "thug life" propaganda George Clooney has dedicated his life to promulgate. Whether it's stealing major artworks or spitting in the face of Bill O'Reilly, Clooney's sleaze is potent enough to drip off of our television screens and swallow every inch of our souls, ready for attack.

It appears that one of those unfortunate victims of the Clooney propaganda machine (and the Marky Mark machine too) is none other than ex-UC Election Committee chair and perennial UC fixture Josh Allen '09, who the omniscient Gossip Geek lenses caught prancing about the Carpenter Center last week in the middle of a student art gallery.

Here we can appreciate Allen (right) beside a suspicious bystander scoping out the scene, shifting about with the suave debonair of a French aristocrat. Already previously sighted stealing George Clooney films from the internet, we can expect Allen to attempt to push through a pork-barrel project in the next UC meeting to buy himself mountain climbing gear and anti-laser sensory equipment in order to storm the Carpenter Center and filch away student projects. It is rumored that "Project Marky Mark", as the heist is called in certain circles, is a conspiracy involving characters as diverse as Porcellian Don Juan Pierpaolo Barbieri '09 and celebrity sibling Bret Voith '11 (brother of Phoenix magnate and Roy Wiley '09 role model John Voith '07).

We're onto you, Allen.

Your resident Captain Planet or something,

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