Everything that is Right With the World

... is encompassed in these three sexy lads. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, Reggaeton idols The Toners are just what we need in this time of economic crisis and presidential candidate airplane deficiency! Check out their unbelievable prowess as a group here:

The Toners, an international sensation hailing from Dflanz HQ and world capital of Latino novelty acts Miami, FL, are the vanguard of an avant-garde Latin Jazz music that has infected the world with its insatiable horniness and gratuitous violence. It is the Quentin Tarantino of Hispanic music genres, and The Toners, as the epitome of the genre, it's Caligula (consequently making Daddy Yankee the bastard Incitatus of pop). They once aspired to reggaeton superstardom, and those dreams are now a reality, for they have been featured on GossipGeek. But, moreover, their debut album, "Dale Con Everything" ("Give with Todo" for the gringos) is in the final (or introductory, we have no fucking clue) stages of its development.

Che-Frio, Tito, and Laz- the hott trio of gustatory content that comprise the team- have hit the ground running with their debut single "Te Toco El Toqui-Toqui" ("I Touch Your Touchy-Touchy," for you gringos), an acoustic masterpiece running the gamut of human experiences from sado-masochism to Lindsay Lohan to nuclear war, all over a savory blanket of American classic "Somewhere Over the Rainbow." The masterpiece climaxes at the demand not to be fucked with, only to resume in pangs of earnest yearning for things to not be like this, but to be like that, and culminating in a tremendous toqui-toqui.The Unplugged version of the instant classic is available for viewing in the trailer.

You can download "Te Toco el Toqui-Toqui" at their MySpace Music page right here. Hit em up, bro, cause reggaeton ain't a fad!

(¿Y como se dice "fad"? Gordo.)

Needless to say, we'd really like to sit down and have a chat with the trio- their impact on Harvard social life could be monumental. If you would like to seem them perform at GossipStock™ 2009 along with Petros Shields '09 and Matt Drudge (the venue: currently Enigmatic Seal's dreams), show your support in the comments below!